Make It or Break It

Failure is opportunity

Laura and John — Thu, 30 May 2013 14:39:06 +0000

Failure is simply the opportunity to begin again – this time more intelligently. –Henry Ford

Laura and John — Wed, 15 May 2013 14:36:52 +0000

“I am convinced that the only people worthy of consideration in this world are the unusual ones.” –Frank Lyman Baum, author of The Wizard of Oz

Happiness the other side of divorce?

Laura and John — Sun, 30 Dec 2012 17:21:55 +0000

“It’s quite common for people in an unhappy marriage to think that happiness is just on the other side of divorce. It’s ironic. When we’re single, we’ll be happy when we meet someone. Once we’re married, we think we’ll be happy when we’re single.” –Mort Fertel

Natural Order of Things

Laura and John — Sun, 02 Dec 2012 15:38:10 +0000

A bridge is built
For a minute it’s new
Then a crack begins
Some rust shows through

The shiny paint peels
The cables fray
What was perfect and true
Starts to fade away

It’s just the natural order of things
Without constant care
And endless repair
A bridge standing tall
Will topple and fall
It’s just the natural order of things

A garden is sown
For a time it will bloom
Then a weed takes root
And steals more room

The leaves go dry
Young buds fall away
What was lush and green
Turns a tangle of grey

It’s just the natural order of things
Without tender care
And patience to spare
The garden you tend
Will come to an end
It’s just the natural order of things

A bridge will fall
A garden will die
I sit here alone
And now I know why

A promise was made
Two lives were one
Then time went by
The two came undone

A kiss was stolen
A lie was told
Then a vow was broken
And a touch turned cold

It’s just the natural order of things
Without simple care
And being aware
In the strongest of hearts
Carelessness starts
It’s just the natural order
The natural order
It’s the natural order
The natural order
The natural order
Of things

–Scott Burkell and Paul Loesel

Distorted Sense of Self

Laura and John — Sun, 18 Nov 2012 15:41:14 +0000

“Narcissism and paranoia are flip sides of the same distorted sense of self-importance.” — Sue Grafton in “’P’ is for Peril”

Living Alone Together

Laura and John — Mon, 05 Nov 2012 14:13:06 +0000

Whether one is left or does the leaving – or never leaves or is left physically, just emotionally – the breakdown of a relationship in which one has invested much hope and many years is a daunting experience. The fact that it may be financially catastrophic and complicate the raising of children only deepens the emotional loss and accounts for the fact that many people elect to remain in unhappy marriages. Many couples live alone together. – adapted from Gordon Livingston’s “AND NEVER STOP DANCING”

Have you been ‘fired’ as a marriage partner?

Laura and John — Sat, 13 Oct 2012 13:26:52 +0000

Does the following apply to one’s getting “fired” as a marriage partner? We think it does:

“I’ve heard that no one gets fired without secretly hoping for the liberation, but that sounds like the kind of pronouncement you make before you’ve been given the boot. Being fired is the pits, ranking right up there with infidelity in its brutalizing effect. The ego recoils and one’s self-image is punctured like a tire by a nail. In the weeks since I’d been terminated, I’d gone through all the stages one suffers at the diagnosis of a soon-to-be-fatal disease: anger, denial, bargaining, drunkenness, foul language, head colds, rude hand gestures, anxiety, and eating disorders of sudden onset. I’d also entertained a steady stream of loathsome thoughts about the man responsible. Lately, however, I’d begun to wonder if it wasn’t true, this notion of a repressed desire to be unceremoniously shit-canned.” –Sue Grafton in “I” is for Innocent

Love ends?

Laura and John — Wed, 10 Oct 2012 15:38:24 +0000

“A big lesson about loving someone is coming to understand that when love ends for one person, it ends for both people. The important part of this is recognizing when it has ended and not fighting against that.” –Elizabeth George

The Problem of Pain

Laura and John — Sun, 30 Sep 2012 19:50:00 +0000

“when pain is to be born, a little courage helps more than much knowledge, a little human sympathy more than much courage, and the least tincture of the love of God more than all.” ― C.S. Lewis, The Problem of Pain

You Are What You Do

Laura and John — Tue, 25 Sep 2012 14:32:13 +0000

We all know the saying, “You are what you eat.” How we spend our calories determines our health. Want to be fat? Eat plenty of fat.

When it comes to your marriage, “You are what you do.” How you and your beloved spend your time determines the health of your relationship. Want to feel connected? Spend time together. Do your own thing too often and you may sleep in the same bed, but you’ll feel worlds apart.